beginnings and endings

a dear friend recently commented (we were discussing knitting) that beginning and ending a project were the hardest…the beginning because you were learning the pattern and reading directions etc, and the ending because you were letting go of something.

I tend to think that most beginnings and endings are difficult…

take vacations for example… as much as i like to think of myself as spontaneous, i am not really…i am a ‘closet-planner’.   My husband, on the other hand, is a spur of the moment person, who can decide on the way to a neighboring town for a grocery trip that we should all travel to Seche Hollow to see the fall colors…with 3 kids all under the age of 12 (one in diapers). This is a true story.  Let’s keep in mind that neither of us actually knew where Seche Hollow was, we had no clothes packed and about $125 between us (in an age before debit cards, credit cards, GPSs and cell phones).  His reasoning was ‘we are already heading in the right direction’.  And if we didn’t go right then, we would ‘miss the fall colors’.  Call me crazy, but after i stopped hyperventilating at the mere thought, i went along with it…reasoning that it would be >fun<.  Now that was a difficult beginning… we did make it to Seche Hollow, after a number of wrong turns, one down a section line and into a cow pasture (my husband REFUSES to ask anyone for directions- but that is a whoooole other blog post!).  And the colors were beautiful, the trees magnificent and the quiet was sacred…and it was hard to turn around and go home.

relationships can present some challenges in the beginning…some difficulties.  The normal ones are usually:

  • does he think i’m pretty?
  • did he really mean to slam the door in my face?
  • could i learn to handle his (insert annoying habit here)?

in our case, it was “why does he KEEP driving past my house in that loud pick-up!?”

Ending relationships is always hard, i think…whether a friendship, a business relationship, a marriage.  Always difficult to end, to say that you have learned all you could from one another, to admit that this is no longer serving the purposes that it was created for, to let go for another…always hard.

beginning something new…jumping in…in that moment, you are making a commitment to explore something different…to build something.  Whether its me trying to knit socks (which i have back-burnered for the time being), a new job, riding in a hot air balloon for the first time, or a new creative piece- you are finding your way…learning…and there is so much hope, fear, excitement, wonder…

i like beginnings best.

never satisfied…

“I have a masters degree, certainly i can figure this out!” If you have been around my house in the past month or so, you have heard me muttering this, or something similar…its usually low and under my breath, as I wrestle with knitting needles. Yes, you heard me right, knitting needles.  It started with the spinning.  I do love to spin, but the yarn is piling up.  I put some of it on my etsy site, but no one wants to buy yarn from a potter, i think.

i mastered the “Knifty Knitter” a few years ago, which is this funky loom that you can make hats and scarves on.  I really love the Knifty Knitter…its easy and fun and i can make something in an evening…and for just $9.98, you too can be a Knifty Knitter- oops, never mind, felt like a commercial for a second.  The Knifty Knitter has its place, but really? How many hats and scarves can you use, or give away?  I really wanted to make socks- and reasoned that they would be similar to making hats, just with a toe and heel.  So I searched high and low for a “sock loom”- found a couple and finally ordered one.

The sock loom was no good. I was so excited, bought some special sock yarn- thought i should start with some yarn FOR socks first… a bit let down…its kinda hard to do- the pegs are small, and the yarn is fine, and well, it was going to take me forever to make a pair of socks…i had visions of socks just flying out of this little loom…i would be giving socks away, there would be so many…not the story at all…those “get socks quick” schemes never work…i should have known.

So i was back to – “i have ALL this yarn!! what am i going to do with it?” except now, we had added “and I really want to knit my own socks”.  The unspoken words in this sentence are, “and I want it to be fun, quick and easy, and i want to use all my handspun yarn.”

And then I met Judy…